This growing up thing, which i still seem to be doing and probably will forever be doing until I die, is pretty darn tough sometimes. I often wonder if the fact that I’m in my early 30′s and still single makes it harder or easier- as I have many friends who are married with kids and seem to be doing a better job at it than myself. However, the fact that my choices are left up to me and me alone- with no one else to be responsible for besides myself and the two baby dogs- makes it both very freeing and a little bit more dangerous. I of course, live my life pretty much on the safe side. My biggest decision is what to do on the weekends, or whether i want to rent my house in Little Rock to be closer to work (20 minutes away) or continue to make the drive. Not that life-altering of options.

But two of my dearest and closest friends just recently made the decision to take new jobs in completely different states, far away from ex-boyfriends, loving families, and great friends. My heart is bursting with emotion as I think of them traveling today- both out of overwhelming pride and deep sadness because I will miss them so much.

This girl- my best friend in the world, travel buddy, cousin, and closest confidant- is en route to her new job as a travel nurse on the gorgeous Big Island of Hawaii! She just signed a 3 month contract and is living her dream of travel and nursing together- which i think is just the most fabulous thing ever! Although we’ll still talk every day and I’ve already booked my trip to visit next month, I will definitely miss our weekly dinners, movie nights, day trips, and just her overall presence. She is so much a part of my life and I honestly could never repay her for all the advice, love & support she’s giving me over the years.

Next is this girl, my sweet and beautiful Asian barbie, Ann. Ann has had a hard couple of years getting a job because she was not born in the US and it’s apparently close to impossible to get a green card unless you get married. (this fact infuriates me actually- are we not in America, in 2013- and the only way for a highly educated brilliant and talented young lady to be able to work in the United States is if she up and marries some American man???? Enough of the rant- but it really is a disgrace…). However, she was recently granted an extended workers permit and knew she couldn’t let that go to waste. Theater jobs in Arkansas are few and far between so she applied and was just accepted as the stage manager for the finale event at the roller coaster capital of the world, Ceder Point theme park in Sandusky Ohio! I am so proud of her for taking the plunge and living her dream, but damn I’ll miss this one to death too!

Kara and Ann, I love both of you so very much and am extremely inspired by your courage and independence. I will miss you like crazy but know this is the path God has put you on. Best of luck to my two fabulous, beautiful, brilliant single ladies! Go get em girls!

May the road rise up to meet you, may the wind be ever at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face and the rain fall softly on your fields. And until we meet again, May God hold you in the hollow of his hand.

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This has been a crazy 30 days for me… I was offered an awesome new job in Conway and decided I would not only accept, but dive into the commitment head first. I’m selling my house in Little Rock and moving to be closer to work and family. It makes so much more sense with my dogs- plus the outrageous price of gasoline would cost me over $100/week to commute. I’m completely over Little Rock as it as- and while Conway is nothing new- at least it’s a change of scenery.

Which leads me to the point of this post- change… Change is as scary as it is exciting, and my how I needed a change in my life. I’ve been doing the same thing- dating the same guys, hanging out with the same people, working the same job- for way too long now. I woke up last month and realized nearly 10 years had passed with very little to show for it. Not that I’m unhappy with my life or decisions up to this point, I just haven’t been challenging myself and feel stagnant. This change will take me out of my comfort zone and force me to make something new out of myself- start over and give a 100% to a new place, job, home, life.

Because I love to quote quotes, and it’s already been said better than I could say it myself:

“Sometimes it’s the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
“There is nothing wrong with change, if it is in the right direction”
“Life can either be accepted or changed. If it is not accepted, it must be changed. If it cannot be changed, then it must be accepted.”
“Growth means change and change involves risk, stepping from the known to the unknown.”
“When you’re finished changing, you’re finished.”
“We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person.” (sad face)

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